Mar 4, 2014


I wasn't aware that today is Fat Tuesday. Probably because I am fat every day of the week, so why would today be any different? I know, I know, it's for Mardi Gras. But, that still doesn't change that fact that I have fat Sundays, Mondays, Tuesdays, Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, AND Saturdays. Although, sometimes I pretend I am skinny, and then reality hits.

SO, lesbihonest, I did not do well with my 10 day cleanse. This past week has been so busy, packing, moving, cleaning, unpacking. Just a stressful week, with that being said, I am ordering my 10 day cleanse today, and I am starting over! I want to get a few people to do it with me, that way we can have a group support system. So if you're interested, let me know, and we can set you up! I am ready for changes. BIG changes. Moving into this house with my boyfriend, and our two children, (puppies), make grown-up-ism seem so real. I am ABSOLUTELY in love with it. Once we get everything settled and all the decor up, I will post pictures. It is way too cute not to share.

Speaking of changes.

I went back to my roots, and cut off basically all of my hair. I love it. Definitely can tell how much healthier it is.

Do you ever wonder why you do certain things? Like why am is sitting here drinking this Dr. Pepper, it tastes like crap, yet I am STILL drinking it!?! I remember right after I had my surgery, I couldn't even eat sugar free jello without it being entirely too sweet. I absolutely loved that. I loved that things tasted different. I thought it would get me through the process. That I wouldn't miss the foods that got me to rock bottom. And I really didn't. NOTHING tasted the same. So why did I keep trying to eat it? Did I think maybe one day the flavors will come back? I honestly couldn't tell you. If only there was a rewind button, right? Wrong. There are so many obstacles in life, and everyone faces their own demons. If there weren't those demons to face, how could you find the strength to fight? I have about 7 really close friends. Out of the 7, 5 of them are overweight, according to the world's "standards". I happen to think every single one of them are absolutely beautiful. Your weight does not define you, unless YOU let it. Everyone, especially us females, knit picks at their body. At what point does it stop? My goal as of right now is to be down to 200 lbs. Okay, what then? Am I going to find something else to hate on? To truly love yourself, you must accept yourself. So what if the two people on the left don't think of you as attractive, funny, stylish, or what have you, as long as YOU think it, I promise you, there is 20 more people to the right of you, who think the world of you. Just think about it, if you could love yourself and see yourself just as the people closest to you, how different your life would be. I WISH that I could love myself as much as the people in my life love me. I wish I could see what they see. But, what's holding me back from doing just that? ME. I know what type of person I am, hell, if I was a different person, I would wanna know me. Learning to love yourself, is so much harder than loving someone else. After all, you are your biggest critic. Instead of looking in the mirror and seeing your faults, look for the good in you. And LEARN to love your faults. They are apart of you. If we can become blinded by the faults of the ones we love, why can't we become blinded by our own?
"When you can accept the mistakes you've made, the person you are today, and the faults you have, then and only then you can life your life and be happy"Brandon Hofer

I think everyone can learn something from animals. The way they love is absolutely unconditional. YOU are there home. To them, you hung the moon. The love that these two babies give me, is amazing. Even if they do pee, poop, and hump on everything. They need me just as much as I need them.

And on that note, I must bid you adieu.


No comments:

Post a Comment